Jul 204 min read

Renewal in Friendship

Time flies. Life is busy. We find ourselves in steady motion. Before we are truly aware it is all even happening, we suddenly realize distance and disconnection have occurred within our friendships. Of course we don’t mean for it to happen, but the reality is our friendships cannot thrive if we are functioning as on autopilot mode due to changing life seasons that make it challenging to stay in sync with each other.

I know I have been there, how about you? Well-meaning in my heart but flawed in my follow-through. Nothing big or bad - no blow up - just a fading friendship I did not properly maintain. As I write this blog post, there are names and faces of a few friends right now I know I need to reach out to in initiating renewal in our friendship. Do you have any that also come to mind?

The good news is we do not have to wait for a special occasion or holiday to practice renewal in our friendships. As a matter of fact, we can simply start again where we are right now. It is never too late to pick up the phone and call, send that text message, or extend the invitation for a coffee/tea date. Life is short. When we are blessed to experience the gift of godly friendship, we should treasure and nurture it. Pursuing renewal in friendship is one way we can honor God for our friends.

In Proverbs 17:17 (NIV), we are reminded: “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.” In life and friendship there will be good times, bad times, happy times, sad times, hard times, rough times, joyful times, and busy times. But no matter what - through thick and thin - friends will never stop loving each other. We just need to be proactive and intentional about renewing the bonds we once shared or creating new rhythms to strengthen the friendship.

If you are currently experiencing a season of friendship where it feels hard to connect, or maybe you have so much going on in your own life personally, it just seems easier to distance yourself from others, please receive this encouragement today: even if your capacity has changed, be honest with yourself and your friend. Let them know it’s not personal. Keep an open mind and heart that there is no distance or disconnect too greater than God’s ability to help you both come to a place of renewal in the friendship. Choose to show unconditional support despite the shifts that may occur in your individual lives and thereby resulting in strain within the friendship.

Ladies, let us resolve to be the kind of friend we want others to be to us. Let’s be grace-giving. In one season it may be our friends turn to be distracted by life, and we will need to be the one to initiate renewal in the friendship. But in another season, it may be our turn, and we will be grateful that our friend did not cancel us out because we may have found ourselves in an unexpected season. I leave you with Philippians 2”3-5 (NIV):

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:”

Take a moment to reconnect with that friend whom it’s been a while since you’ve talked. You will never regret it. Most importantly, you will be ever grateful for the goodness God gives that you would have missed out on if you had not made the decision to experience renewal in friendship. May you continue to flourish in your friendships and be continually blessed by them.